6 Sex Tips That Every Gay Man Should Know

gay sex tips for men

Sex education in the United States is still one of the most needed curriculums at schools. Many teenagers are ready to have sex, but they don’t know the basics of safe sex. You can find out even less when it comes to gay sex. Most teachers you have sex ed classes with are cis, heterosexual people who probably know nothing about douching or what penis extension sleeve is.

Nevertheless, even experienced people can sometimes lack basic knowledge about various techniques or positions. Here, you will find the six sex tips for gay men that may clear things up for everyone, no matter how experienced!

1. Use a Condom

This is the number one sex advice you should be taking from any person who has ever had sex. Using a condom is one of the best things you can do to prevent HIV and other STDs. If you are switching partners often or just had an encounter with someone you’ve recently met, make sure that you use protection. If you’re going to have anal sex, use a condom – you can find different types of condoms, including ones with extra lube built-in.

2. Lube It Up

two men in bed holding each other intimately

Lubricant is essential for anal sex, especially for beginners. You might feel uncomfortable or even painful when your anus is not sufficiently lubricated. A proper anal lube will help you relax, get comfortable, and enjoy the process. You can use silicone-based lubricants as well as water-based ones.

Moreover, using lubricants is the only way to make sure that you don’t hurt your partner by using too much force. Always use plenty of lube to help you slide in, and it will also prevent any tearing or damage caused by friction.

Silicone-based lubes are often said to last longer than water-based lubes because they won’t dry up as quickly; this makes them perfect for long sessions of anal play. However, if you decide to use a silicone-based lube, bear in mind that it could break down latex condoms over time.

3. Get into Position

You can try many different positions when having anal sex, but there are two main ones – the doggy style and the missionary position. The first one is particularly popular due to several reasons:

  • Your partner penetrates you from behind, which means he can control the speed and depth of penetration.
  • It stimulates the prostate gland, which is exceptionally pleasurable for some people.
  • You can easily use a toy on yourself while getting penetrated.

Experiment with different positions and take your time to get to know each other’s bodies better, and see which positions feel best for you and your partner.

4. Build Up to Having Anal Sex

Don’t expect to have great anal sex from the very beginning. You need to learn how to relax your anus beforehand. Start with easier sexual activities, like manual stimulation or oral sex. When you start feeling relaxed, get into a doggy position and start penetrating yourself with your fingers – slowly at first and then faster and deeper.

Once you are comfortable with that, move on to a sex toy and finish by having real sex with your partner. It’s essential to take your time and ensure there is no rush if you want great results.

5. Don’t Rush It

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The most important thing when it comes to anal sex is taking it slow and easy. Your body needs some time to adjust to the new activity, especially if it is your first time. There are many nerve endings around your anus, so it takes some time for your body to realize that it can handle more pain or pleasure without any consequences.

Also, don’t forget about relaxing and breathing properly! As we said before, the doggy style is great for anal sex because it allows you to control the depth of penetration and breath slowly so that your body will have time to adjust. Take deep breaths in and out, and stop if you feel any pain or discomfort.

On the contrary, you don’t want to go too fast and hurt your partner. With lots of lube, you should be able to slide in gradually. It would be best if you started with small movements and gradually increased your pace as you get used to each other’s bodies. Don’t rush things!

6. Aftercare Is Important Too

After having sex, don’t forget about aftercare – especially if it was the first time for you. Relaxation and some rest are essential since it allows your body to recover. A nice bath or shower can help relax your body muscles and soothe the pain or soreness. Drink plenty of water afterward – 8 to 10 cups would be ideal. And don’t forget about that post-sex cuddling! It’s just as important as foreplay since it helps bond two people together.


The most important thing when it comes to having great sex is remembering that only you can decide how far you want to go. As long as you feel comfortable and safe, there’s nothing wrong with experimenting with your partner. Different people have different preferences when it comes to sex, so try new things and see what works best for you.

It may take a little bit of getting used to, but once you’ve tried it a few times, you’ll realize just how much pleasure you can derive from anal sex. However, remember that safety is key and be mindful of your sensations. And don’t forget about condoms if you want to enjoy great sex without harming your body!